FRANCE: THE WORST COUNTRY EVER!
Arthurshall.com tears France a new, even bigger, asshole!

The unemployment in France is continually over 10%... this is why.

The French no vote on the European Union Constitution has given the world someone other than the United States to laugh at and mock for the time being. Some people might like to think that this no vote was a intentional rebuke of a huge confusing document that might further entangle Europe's markets with bureaucracy. They would be wrong. If there is one consistent theme in French politics since WWII, it is France's pathetic attempts to remind the rest of the world that they still matter. France is without a doubt, the most insecure country with any sort of standing in the world. Their constant temper tantrums and stagnant economy should serve to remind us of what the French themselves have suspected for a long time. France does not deserve their current place in the world. France is a worthless country populated by a bunch of insecure socialist women.

The Constitutional Vote
The real reasons the French vetoed the EU Constitution (a document that they drafted themselves) are many, and perhaps not what we might think. A fear of Turkey joining the EU and a massive Muslim immigration is one likely reason. The French do fear religion and people with dark skin in general, but even more likely is the fact that the EU Constitution is too free market for the French. They enjoy their 35-hour work weeks, massive government sponsored health care, welfare, and pension plans, and don't particularly enjoy basic personal freedoms. Oh, and vacations, the French love their vacations.

These are policies that would not be feasible if France had to open up its labor markets to the rest of Europe or provide an effective national defense. If France had signed the EU Constitution, they would be forced to compete with the rest of Europe and the world. The French make excuses for their social welfare policies by saying they are a more humane society, but their massive welfare "utopia" is only possible because France's very existence as a country has been subsidized by the American taxpayer since WWII. They are speaking French instead of German or Russian because of us. Without the United States, their liberal socialist system would be an oppressive totalitarian communist system. France thus loses any right to talk down to the US as a less humanitarian country.

Protecting freedom and human rights isn't just a domestic issue as the French would have us believe. The security France enjoys requires benevolent world powers to exert influence and often force, not turn inward and become self concerned. Which country is truly more humanitarian, the country that exercises well intentioned (but failing) social experiments, or the country that makes that lifestyle of personal freedoms and self government possible in the first place? It’s clear the US holds and always has held the moral high ground on this issue.

It's almost scary how self-concerned and arrogant France's veto of the EU Constitution is. Let us for a moment set aside how complicated or poorly written the document might have been, because that's not the objection most French voters had. The Constitution might have actually been the answer to their economic stagnation, forcing them to compete with the rest of Europe and the world. A unified EU might well benefit all the countries of Europe, but we are talking about France here. They are of course concerned more with their egos than their friend's or even their own welfare. The rest of Europe is now either completely depressed about the whole issue or laughing at the French, who deserve every bit of it.

Fear of Religion
Another example of the egotism and the sickness of French culture is also related to their fear of an Islamic invasion. Last year the French banned any visible religious symbols in French public schools. Sure, they banned crosses, Jewish skullcaps, and Sikh turbans along with Muslim headdresses, but nobody with a brain was fooled into thinking that it was anything other than an reaction to the massive influx of Muslims from the Middle East and North Africa. This wasn’t just some freak law proposed by Jacques Chirac’s cabinet either, polls showed that over 70% of French citizens support the ban. It’s amazing that American leftists can side with France on so many cultural issues when their government tramples their citizen’s religious freedoms like this. Imagine if George W. Bush proposed such a law? What would the American left say then?

More and more France is resembling the Soviet government they feared for so many years. The French are religion-phobes who (possibly correctly) see religion as a threat to their vision of a enlightened utopia of welfare, government bureaucracy, and complete dependence on the state. I would usually refrain from using the "slippery slope" argument as it is a so often too broad, but in this case one wonders, what other restrictive laws might the French enact in the future? If a population feels as culturally threatened by immigration as the French, is it any surprise that these new populations are slow to assimilate? Thankfully, Americans actually aren't as egotistical as the French, and we for the most part, accept other cultures with open arms. We also have a real constitution that makes such stupid laws unthinkable. Thank Allah for that!

Nuke Testing
In 1963, the United States and for the most part, the rest of the civilized world signed the Limited Test Ban Treaty that outlawed nuclear tests in the atmosphere (above ground), underwater, or space. With France's demonstrated love for unenforceable international law, one might think they would be along for the ride. Nope, you'd be wrong again. With new techniques in computer modeling and with the Cold War being over, the US exploded its last underground (thus perfectly legal) test in 1992. I'm sure many France loving Seattle coffeehouse types showed up to protest that one. What these bean freaks may not know is that in a series of desperate acts to remind the rest of the world that they still matter, France continued underwater nuclear testing in the open ocean until 1996. Imagine the dolphin carnage! This practice put France in some fine company among the world's most advanced and forward thinking nations still testing nuclear weapons above ground and in the ocean: countries like China, Pakistan, and North Korea.

What might be most sad about this isn't the unnecessary environmental damage or floating whale corpses, but the arrogance and lack of reasoning behind it. What reason did France have to be flexing military or nuclear muscle? There were no threats to world peace in 1996. France and most other nuclear powers had the ability to bomb most of us back to the Stone Age already, and France was safe and secure under the safety blanket provided by American taxpayers. The same safety blanket the French have enjoyed since the US defeated Germany and gave the them their country back. Perhaps a French military buildup would bring them some respect internationally, but that would require a deployable, well-trained infantry and better technology. Money better spent on a massive welfare and entitlement state in the minds of the French. A more powerful and technologically advance French army could have helped in Bosnia, but underwater nuclear testing served no purpose except to remind us all that unfortunately, France does still exist. We took notice, and recalled that France is in fact a nation full of emasculated sissies who, in throwing yet another hissy-fit, are undeserving of their current place in the world or the United Nations. Whether the UN deserves to exist or not is another discussion entirely.

Indefensible Opposition to the War in Iraq
I can understand why some people opposed the Iraq war. To many, a preemptive war is a radical new idea, and although the United States had "legal" reasons to invade Iraq it is understandable that some would hesitate. As usual, the French took the forefront in opposition to the war, which would have been fine if it were a principled position, or if they had any credibility. French credibility? Now there's an oxymoron.

What the European Union wants more than anything else is to provide a balance of power to the United States. Perhaps not militarily, but at least economically. I don't think we can blame them for this, and we should respect countries like the UK for challenging us economically, but still standing with us when it is in everyone's best interest. Tony Blair may be a bit of a socialist by American standards, but he still seems to be a principled leader devoted to making the world a better place. The French of course lack the well-earned self-esteem the British enjoy. France opposes the United States on almost any international issue that serves the national interest of Americans, and quite often the rest of the free world. They stubbornly refuse to learn any historic lesson from their disgraceful appeasement of Hitler in the 1930's and try to strike deals with the likes of Saddam Hussein. They foolishly try to reason with any insane tyrant the US is trying to depose by offering trade deals or selling them nuclear reactors (thanks Israel!). Of course, the only way the French can compete with American companies is when American companies are barred from doing any business in a given country... see Iraq and Iran. They do, of course, welcome our military expertise whenever a humanitarian mission arises in which the US has no national interest. The fact is, the US can fight a more effective war on European soil than France can. Now that's a sad statement.

With the UN Oil for Food scandal, the French have lost any remaining credibility they like to think they once had. France's egotism and predictable objections to US foreign policy are quite likely making the world a more dangerous place. The UN is now essentially broken, unable to make any firm decisions or act on any issue of importance. The UN requires strong countries to take unified leadership roles in order for the organization to work, and when France opposes real countries like the US, Japan, and the UK, they show us that they really are no better than the hundreds of other pissant states jealous of American power and prestige. A firm stand against Iraq by the UN might well have deposed Saddam without a war. To say France is blameless in the UN's complete loss of credibility would be a joke. They are half of the problem. How did a country full of cheese eating socialist sissies with no military to speak of become a threat to world peace? Amazing!

In Summary
As the French tantrums for attention and respect continue it only serves to cause us to further question their place in the world. What has France contributed to the world or to freedom in the past 100 or even 200 years? Little to nothing that doesn't involve food, that's for sure. But was there really a time when France was powerful, or when they did matter? I suppose so, but as they botched their revolution, the man who took control of their pathetic little country, Napoleon, wasn't even French. He was Corsican and he grew up hating the French political system for its class based power structure, which he promptly dismantled. Even then, as Napoleon terrorized the monarchies of Europe who weren't accustomed to fighting real wars, his lack of Naval power meant he was never a threat to a real country like England.

Is France the most worthless country ever? Probably not, but they are certainly the most worthless country who ever pretended to be a world power. As the rest of Europe accepts their place in the world, or admirably strives for something greater as a union, France just throws one big international temper tantrum after another. Insecure, but still convinced of their own superiority. France doesn't serve anyone else's interests, and most often not even their own. What France needs is a strong free market leader with a realist worldview, but there just isn't a French Margaret Thatcher anywhere on the horizon. That idea is of course ludicrous, because Margaret Thatcher is then times the man of any Frenchman. Perhaps France has passed the point of no return and are now doomed to decades of stagnation or an eventual complete collapse of their bloated bureaucratic government. The Truth, as if I haven’t already made the point: France is a insecure nation of women who have accomplished virtually nothing in their long history of arrogance and failure. As Americans, and citizens of the world it is our responsibility take every opportunity to humiliate and laugh at these self-destructive losers.

-shat@arthurshall.com